Flaming Creatures #MovieReview

Film 88 in the “1001 Films to See Before You Die Challenge” is 1963’s “Flaming Creatures”. This is listed as a drama on IMDb. The book lists this as an erotic piece of art. I list this as an unwatchable mess that turns into rape porn. This film didn’t know what the hell to film, who ever was operating the camera had clearly never heard of the words “zoom out” because they were close up shots of everything. Close ups of swinging cock and balls, close ups of people’s backs, and close ups of lips for at least 3 minutes. This went from unwatchable to a lipstick advert to a gang bang. I had to switch this off because it just went nowhere from the start and continued to keep going nowhere. This film will now be stuck in my head along with “Cries and Whispers” for having women who enjoy sex to much. In this film, the woman in this film is surrounded by men and she maybe screaming but on camera she looks like she’s laughing. Meanwhile, “Cries and Whispers” had a woman shove a piece of broken glass up her vagina and enjoyed it so much she whipped the blood all over her face. If there’s gonna be sex in the next film I watching in this challenge, can it just be plain, simple sex? No inserting broken glass or women being pounded by 10 men (one of them in drag). If you managed to watch all 42 minutes of this film (it’s currently up in full on YouTube despite there being nudity on display) then let me know what you thought of it in the comments. Here is what I had to say while watching 1963’s “Flaming Creatures”

Film – Flaming Creatures
Year – 1963
Director – Jack Smith
Staring – Francis Francine, Sheila Bick, Joel Markman
IMDb Rating – 5.2/10
My Rating – 0/10 (UNWATCHABLE)
Length – 42 min
Genre – Drama
And we start we bad quality filming
Is someone speaking? I can’t tell
What am I even looking?
Note to the cameraman – ZOOM OUT!!! And put everything in focus!!
I can’t read the casting list!
I can’t see anything
All I see is a hand stroking a nurse with a knife
Is that a man in drag? <- I’m crediting the mother with this line
She is the worst belly dancer I’ve ever seen?
Am I looking at a grandfather clock through a bush now?
I just got told how to apply lipstick
“Lipsticks are curved like hearts”
This is now turned into a Boots/Superdrug advert for lipstick
Did they record this voice over in a hallway?
I just saw swinging cock and balls
They is a cock on the man in drag’s shoulder as he’s applying lipstick
All I can hear is the sound of kissing and moaning
More swinging cock and balls
And now everything’s gone silent
I guess the term “Close-Up” meams stick a camera in someone’s face
Is something meant to be happening?
Run around the twig
Now the man in drag is plaing with one boob while another man shiffs her armpit
Very close up look of a nipple
Is that screaming in the background or the sound of balloons inflating
And this just turned into a gang bang porno
And now I can’t see anything again
Back to the gang bang
Who’s throwing buckets of water on them?
She clearly doesn’t shave downstairs
Now I’m watching a man kiss a cock
Foot fetish
More close ups of people’s backs
SCREW THIS
THIS IS UNWATCHABLE
THE END
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