Night of the Living Dead #MovieReview

Film 78 in the “1001 Films to See Before Your Die” challenge is 1968’s “Night of the Living Dead”. Not gonna lie, this was terrible! Terrible acting, terrible quality (granted it was from the 1960’s) and I couldn’t see a thing. The zombies didn’t look remotely like zombies. They all looked like they decided to walk home from the pub after having one too many pints and stilt their kebab all over themselves. I wanted to punch Barbera in the face for being utter terrible. She couldn’t act, she was constantly stroking knifes, curtains and sofas, she did nothing to helping the team and wouldn’t shut up about Johnny. So when Ben smacked her in the face and when she was eventually killed and eaten, I was glad! I actually smiled! And I’m not one for abuse against women but she deserved it. Staying on Barbera, her and Johnny were brother and sister! You wouldn’t know it from the acting. I thought they were husband and wife. I actually had to pause the film just so I could get some form of info or anything that could help me. IMDb wasn’t any help and told me that the blood in the film was actually chocolate syrup. It didn’t help matters when my mum thought I was watching “The Evil Dead”, which I’ve already seen and reviewed for this list. In an interview in 2010, director George A Romero was quoted in saying, “My stories are about humans and how they react, or fail to react, or react stupidly. I’m pointing the finger at us, not at the zombies. I try to respect and sympathize with the zombies as much as possible.” The problem, which I’ve already stated, with the first part of that quote was that no one could act! Also, after reading that, was I meant to be rooting for the zombies? Because I sure as hell wasn’t rooting for everyone else. Fun fact of the film, the word “zombie” is never used in the film. Instead, the living dead are referred to as ghouls or “those things.” Enough ranting, If you have seen this film then let me know what you thought of it in the comments. It’s currently free to watch on Amazon Prime Instant Video! Here is what I had to say while watching 1968’s “Night of the Living Dead”. Now excuse me while I watch “Shaun of the Dead”

Film – Night of the Living Dead
Year – 1968
Director – George A. Romero
Staring – Duane Jones, Judith O’Dea, Karl Hardman
IMDb Rating – 8/10
My Rating – 2/10
Length – 95 min (1h 35min)
Genre – Horror, Indie Arthouse
We’re in the countryside
This music’s giving me the chills
Good God she’s ugly!
A six hour drive for a five minute task
Don’t you hate it when the radio stops working?
Let’s just blame Daylight Savings Time for my tiredness
Looks like a storm is on the way
“Prayings for church, not for graves”
I’m putting my driving gloves on to make a statement
Johnny seems like a bit of a dick
This really does feel like amateur hour
Johnny knocked himself out by bashing his head onto a grave head
She’s fucking dove!!!! And that person was nowhere near her
Just drive off!!!
Now you drive off… At 5mph
Oh no! My car broke down from scrapping it against a tree going 1mph
This is already terrible and I’m 10 minutes in
Who leaves their home unlocked and with the door wide open when you’re not in?
A kitchen knife! That’ll show him
Is this person meant be a zombie?
Fuck your washing line
Damn! The phone’s not working!
They don’t even look like zombies! They look like they’re on their way home and are completely drunk
That person has no face!
Here I come to save the day!!!
I’ve been dripped on by blood!
Fuck your truck’s headlights
When being attacked by a zombie, use a crowbar to smash the zombie’s head in
That one got a crowbar through the skull
Who left the back door open?
You’re clearly not dead! I can see your eyes moving
Better scare the other zombies away by setting their mate on fire
I have no idea on what her name is but she is completely fucking useless
All she does is stand and stroke her knife or stand still and looks like she’s never been to acting school
Smart idea! Make more noise to attract the zombies even more
I’m gonna block this door with another door
And I’m gonna block the window with an ironing board
I wouldn’t be surprised if she was secretly a zombie by the way shes acting
The sound of a hammer makes you cringe!
But not when you first saw a zombie
And for my next trick, I’m gonna take this table cloth off without any of things on the table falling off
I now have the feeling that she has a fetish for objects
All she does is stroke objects
She’s now stroking a table cloth
TIMEOUT!!!! I have to IMDb this to get some form of info!!!
INTERMISSION
Update! I found no info and my mum though this was 1981’s “The Evil Dead”
Back to the film
And now she talks to him!!!
And it’s taken me 28 minutes to find out that her name is Barbera
Stop telling what happened in the film 28 minutes ago
It is very clear that no one went to acting school
This guys really trying his best to be Samuel L Jackson
Barbera says they should get Johnny
Wait! Her and Johnny are brother and sister! I thought they were married
Thank fuck he slapped her! I’m not usually for abuse to women but she clearly deserved it
Time to light me a fire in the fire place
And also set fire to the sofa
Also, use a table leg with a curtain tied to it as a torch
It’s like bonfire night! Only shitter!
The radio says The President has called for a meeting within the hour
Time to light me a smoke to celebrate me boarding the doors and windows
Shoes! Women like shoes! Wonder if Barbera will like them
I, meanwhile, like that shotgun!
I don’t know the name of his man
You stay down here, I’m going upstairs
Hey dead woman on top of the steps! Just gonna drag you to the back room
“The killers are eating the flesh of the people they kill”
Two men break into the make themselves at home
We don’t save a screaming woman if we’re hiding in the basement
They say that a wife and her kid are hurt in the cellar
Oh stop arguing and just work together
Mr Cooper says he’s heading back into the cellar and board the door
So… you can chop a zombie’s fingers off with a 2×4
That zombie is naked
Tree taste good!
You be boss downstairs, I’m staying up here
The wife heads up but Mr Cooper locks himself and his kid in the cellar
Mr Cooper is in the basement with his wife and child
I’m really hating this
Mrs Cooper demands Mr Cooper unlock the cellar so they can hear the radio
Tom shouts that they’ve set a TV up upstairs
Tom and his wife swap places with Mr and Mrs Cooper
However the child stays on her deathbed
I have the feeling that the child is a zombie
It’s taken me 53 minutes to find out that the black guy’s name is Ben
Again with the stroking
She got scared from a match being lit
“Her brother was killed” – Fuck him!
Back in the day, you played with rabbit antennas to get sound
The news on the TV tells us that the undead are coming back to life
Can someone stop that rattling in the newsroom?
They then report that the army are on the way to a rescue station
This news reporter is the best actor in this film so far
Blame the Venus Radiation on all the problems
The President says he will have an update in the afternoon
Everyone agrees to head to Willard to get help
Time for an interview with Dr Grimes
Dr Grimes starts by talking about medical advice
Ben then tells Mrs Cooper to swap places with Tom’s wife
Now the kid starts moving and talking after pretty much laying dead for the entire film
Dr Grimes says that the undead need to be burned to be killed
Tom nominates himself and Ben to refuil the truck
Mr Cooper is in charge of throwing molotivs out of the upstairs window
Tom’s wife is upset that the phone is broken
I just realised that Tom is missing a piece of his shirt sleeve
Time to reminise about the past
Holy Crap! I fast forwarded a good chunk as this was getting boring and the zombies are eating someone
I don’t know who!
Barbera is suprised that it’s 2:50am
And she’s still talking about Johnny
Mr and Mrs Cooper says her kid got bitten by a zombie
The zombies start making noises
Back with the news
We have footage of cops & outlaws armed with shotguns to take out zombie
“Kill the brain and you kill the goon”
This interview with the Chief is very very long!
Mr Cooper says two people have died already while having an arguement with the wife
The zombies start breaking down the door to get in
Mr Cooper hesitates before grabbing the shotgun and forcing Mrs Cooper into the cellar
Ben attacks and steals the shotgun back and shoots Mr Cooper
Mrs Cooper gets grabbed by the zombies
Mr Cooper goes into the cellar and dies in front of his kid
Barbera sits there and doesn’t fo anything
Mr Cooper is eating her dad!!!
Now she wants Mrs Cooper
She kills Mrs Cooper with multiple stab wounds to the chest with a garden tool
It’s undead Johnny!!!
He’s got Barbera and taking her away
Barbera has been killed and eaten – Good!!!
The kid tries attacking Ben but fails
Ben then locks himself in the cellar as the zombies enter the house
Think that door is secure enough
Mr Cooper comes back to life and immediatly gets killed
Mrs Cooper comes back to life and immediatly gets killed as well
How do you escape a cellar when there’s only one way in and it’s being blocked by hundreds of zombies
How did he survive the entire night???
The outlaws and cops from earlier finally arrive
What are police dogs meant to do in a case like this?
Why is this new anchor talking out of the side of his mouth
The cops and outlaws shoot all the zombies that were in the house as Ben listen on from the basement
Boom! Headshot! – Had to get that in somewhere
The cops have shot Ben in the head and killed him
THE END
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