Die Hard #MovieReview

Yippie-Kay-Ye motherf’ers because film 56 is here! And it’s none other than 1988’s “Die Hard”. The only Die Hard film to make the list out of the five (soon to be six). This was £1 well spend. I enjoyed every minute of it. From the quotable catchphrases to the action scenes to even Alan Rickman. My first taste at seeing Alan Rickman since I last saw him in the Harry Potter films. This was Rickman’s feature film debut and he really made his presence known to all. It’s also my first time seeing Bruce Willis with a full head of hair! This isn’t my first Die Hard film as I have only seen 2007’s Die Hard 4 (Live Free or Die Hard to others) prior to this. I learn a lot from this. Number one is to always expect the unexpected and number two…. DON’T WALK ON BROKEN GLASS WITH NO SHOES ON!!! Thought it was painful enough seeing people run through piles of thumbtacks/drawing pins barefoot but seeing the results of that made me squirm. The scene where McClane falls down a shaft was a mistake! The stuntman was meant to grab the first vent. But you wouldn’t have known that watching it. To me, it looked like he lost his grip was about to take a long ride down until he eventually grabbed one. The Nakatomi tower used in the film is actually the headquarters of 20th Century Fox. The company charged itself rent for the use of the then unfinished building. Bruce Willis was pulling double duty at the time as he was making “Moonlighting” concurrently which accounts for why nearly all of McClane’s scenes take place at night. Willis would shoot his TV series during the day and then come to the Fox lot in the evening to work on this film. The role of Hans Gruber was originally meant to be played by Sam Neill but canceled to either work on “A Cry in the Dark” or “Dead Calm”. If you have seen any of the Die Hard films, then let me know which one’s your favourite in the comments. Here is what I had to say while watching 1988’s “Die Hard”. 

Film – Die Hard
Year – 1988
Director – John McTiernan
Staring – Bruce Willis, Alan Rickman, Bonnie Bedelia
IMDb Rating – 8.3/10
My Rating – 8.6/10
 
Nothing says a good film by getting advice from strangers about how to survive a plane crash
That is a giant teddy bear!
Back in the day when you could smoke in airports
Meanwhile at Nakatomi Co.
Who works this late on Christmas Eve?
Hello, Argyle
Wait… This is your first day on the job driving a limo
Why is John in the front seat and the bear in the back?
Argyle’s a quick learner
“This is Christmas Music” – I was unaware that Run-DMC had a Christmas song?
John arrives at his Holly’s work place
13th floor! Isn’t 13 an unlucky number?
It’s weird seeing Bruce Willis with a full head of hair
John hates men kissing him on the cheek
Was Ellis snorting cocaine before they walked through the door?
Time for John & Holly to reunite… in the bathroom
Pomona, Romona! Same place!
So… Are John and Holly in a “long distance relationship”?
Time to argue about Holly’s new last name
Are they playing a violin version of “Ode to Joy”?
John has a nasty looking scar on his shoulder
This can’t be good
It isn’t! The receptionist is dead!
Was that an exploding Oreo?
ALAN RICKMAN!!!!!!
And that’s the entire building on lockdown
Slide down stairs to get down them faster
Better give Argyle a ring
Argyle’s partying with the bear in the back of the limo
There goes the phone line thanks to a chainsaw
And the massacre has begun
Who has sex in their office?
Why has John escapes with no shoes on?
Now’s not the time to stare at the naked woman across the road
Who scripts their own dialogue?
How does Hans know so much about Takagi
Time to hum “Ode to Joy”
Hans knows his suits
That’s a giant model of a motorway in Indonesia
Who reads Forbes? Do we even have that magazine in the UK?
Hans wants the $640 Million
“What kind of terrorists are you?” 
“Who said we were terrorists?”
John’s eventually found Takagi & Hans
Takagai is sweating bullets
Well that’s Takagi killed
Argyle is still partying and didn’t hear a thing
So.. That safe has seven locks
FIRE ALARM!!!!
WOOP WOOP It’s the sound of the fire brigade – That doesn’t have the same ring as police
Maybe not!!
Where’s John hiding?
Policemen don’t hurt citizens
But John does!!!!
Head first through the wall
Did John kill him by tackling him down the stairs? Yes!
Better check to see what he had on him
I’ll be taking your lighter and your I.D.
Lets make it look like Santa killed him
Who knew it was that easy to open elevator doors
Hans tells everyone that Takagi is dead
Leave or be killed
“Now I Have a Machine Gun! Ho Ho Ho”
John overhears everything from on top of the elevator
Karl is mad his brother is dead
So mad he flips a desk
All Ellis wants to do is bang Holly
How did John end up on the roof
“NO FUCKING SHIT LADY! DO I SOUND LIKE I’M ORDERING A PIZZA?”
Doesn’t look like the police want to help
How many Twinkies do you need
Karl finds John on the roof and the gun fight is on
John escapes through the air vents followed by a ladder down the elevator shaft
Well there’s only one way down
How is that staying put
Karl’s still searching
John nearly goes for a long trip down
In the air vents
“Come to the coast! We’ll get together! Have a few laughs”
“Now I know what a TV dinner feels like”
Karl thinks he’s found John in the air vent
That was close
Meanwhile, the policeman from earlier arrives
John exits the air vents and sees the police car
Eddie’s watching the NFL and lets the cop look around
John tries breaking a window to distract them
The cop gives up his search and leaves – LAPD police are shit are their job
John kills the enemy through the table and throws him on the cop car
Argyle’s still partying
Back up finally arrives
John calls Hans and gives him an update
Better steal your cigarettes… and your C4
Better send Karl to check on everything
John admits he likes Roy Rogers
Yippie-Kay-Ye Motherfucker
Harvey and Gail give us the news
Karl tells Hans about Marco and Heinrich
Theo’s still hacking away
He’s halfway through breaking in
Hans waiting for the FBI
“They have enough explosives to orbit Arnold Schwarzenegger”
Back to drilling
They have a truck to deliver back up
The policeman is Al Powell
News arrives
Holly has a request – To give a pregnant woman a sofa
Argyle’s still partying and hears the news
He uses the CB radio to hear everything
“We’re going in”
No one believes Powell
Argyle has stopped partying and started driving around a locked parking lot
Better hace a Crunch Bar before we kill everyone
Argyle gives up and thinks the bear is talking to him
IT’S THE CAR!!!
RPG!!!!
And there goes the car
John decides to take action and throws a C4 bomb down an elevator shaft
EXPLOSION
Hans remains carm through it all
I think the news reporter shat himself
Who cares about glass?
That got Dwayne told
Ellis has had enough and confronts Hans
He says he can give them John
John just tried a burnt Twinkie
Time to talk about kids
Hans knows who John is now
Ellis talks to John
Work for the bad guys, get a can of Coca-Cola
Ellis is dead
He spilt my Coca-Cola! Jerk!
Dwayne and Powell have an arguement about John
Dwayne and Hans have a chat
Hans wants his friends to be released from prison within two hours
I also heard of Asian Dawn in Times Magazine as well
Hans doesn’t care 
Theo is on lock number five
Helsinki is in Finland NOT SWEDEN!!!
The FBI is here
Two Agent Johnsons!
Agent Johnson is in charge now!
Hans checks on the explosives and leaves his gun behind
They’ve done a terrible job
John’s found Hans and the two share cigarettes
Hans lies that his name is Bill Clay
John gives “Bill” his gun
Hans opens up and admits who he is
Karl’s found John again
I was doing well… then I took a bullet to the knee
Time to walk barefoot on broken glass
Hans has his detonators
Those are some bloody feet
Powell admits he shot a 13 year old as a rookie
There goes all the power
Theo’s broken into the safe
ODE TO JOY
Kagaki keeps a samurai suit in the safe
John’s now using his vest as a bandage
John asks Powell to tell Holly about how much of a jerk he’s been and how supportave he should have been
Powell refuses
The news confronts the maid so they can speak to the kids
John heads back upstairs and sees the explosives
HOW MUCH C4
Karl has John!!!!
The helicopters arrive 
FIGHT!!! – It’s John vs Karl
Hans has found out about Holly’s real last name thanks to the kids being on the news
Meanwhile, John and Karl are still fighting
Everyone is taken to the roof
John wins the fight by hanging Karl from a chain wrapped around his neck
John’s made it onto the roof
The FBI think John’s a terrorist
Time to use the fire hose to vault down
Hans blows up the roof as John jumps
And that’s both Agent Johnson’s dead
Meanwhile, Argyle is chilling as he watchs a ambulamce drive out of a truck
Two bullets left
Argyle has a closer look at the ambulance and crashes into it and knocks out Theo
John has found Hans… and Holly
Eddie is with them as well
John surrenders himself
Hans just said John’s catchphrase
John’s killed Hans and Eddie
Holly’s handcuffed to Hans
HANS IS ALIVE!!!
Not anymore
KISS ME BITCH
The dickheads from the news are back
Holly and John are freed with the rest of the hostages
John and Powell share a hug 
Dwayne isn’t happy
KARL’S ALIVE!!!!
Not anymore as Powell saves the day
ARGYLE’S ESCAPE
Holly punches the news reporter
KISS ME AGAIN BITCH
Vaughn Monroe sings us out
THE END
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