The Matrix

Woah! Film 43 in the “1001 Films to see before to die” is 1999’s “The Matrix”. First thing I’m gonna note is the soundtrack. I love it! Rob Zombie, Rage Against the Machine & Marilyn Manson! What more could you ask for? Was not expecting any of those to appear and I had a massive smile when I heard Rob Zombie’s “Dragula”. Second thing to note is the amazing CGI. Who didn’t drop their jaws when Neo dodge those bullets? Think it’s obvious that I enjoyed this film, even if they were bits that I found to be a little long winded but at no point did that affect how I felt about the film. As someone who hasn’t seen the two films that followed this and has heard nothing but bad things about them, are they worth watching to see how the story ends? Also, correct me if I’m wrong, but wasn’t there a cartoon/anime film based around The Matrix? Keanu Reeves had this to say about The Wachowskis while making the film, “The Wachowskis really are pushers, you know. Really! In their movie, they pushed each actor, each technician to the extreme limit”. Speaking of The Wachowskis, they wanted to shoot all three of The Matrix films together! Keanu responded by saying it was “Totally crazy!” If you have seen this film or the two sequels, The Matrix Reloaded & The Matrix Revolution, then let me know what thought of the film in the comments. Here is what I had to say while watching 1999’s “The Matrix”. Now excuse me while I mosh out to Rage Against the Machine (starts singing “Wake Up”)

Film – The Matrix
Year – 1999
Director – Andy & Lana Wachowski
Staring – Keanu Reeves, Laurence Fishburne, Carrie-Anne Moss
IMDb Rating – 8.7/10
My Rating – 8.95/10
 
Everything’s green!!!
Don’t you just hate AOL Dial-Up connection?
5550690 – I shall be ringing that later
WOOP WOOP IT’S THE SOUND OF THE POLICE
You look evil
How many pop-ups on that laptop?
She’s like Spiderman…. only deadlier
Nothing like a rooftop chase
Slow motion movements!! – I have the feeling I’ll be seeing a lot of that
Like anyone can jump between buildings and not fall to their death
Well that was a stupid idea, Trinity… You got ran over by a dump truck
Neo? Does he live in Rio? Does he smell of B-O? 
Computers can talk to humans and get them out of bed?
“Follow the white rabbit”
Neo’s apartment is a dump!
That woman has a white rabbit tattoo
ROB ZOMBIE’S “DRAGULA”!!!! – Not gonna lie, I marked out!
Trinity looks like a female Tobey Maguire
Trinity is acting like that type of girlfriend you don’t want to break up with incase she freaks out
Neo’s real name is Thomas Anderson??!?
Shout out to FedEx
It’s a phone… that rings when Neo opens the parcel
Neo gets a call that people are coming for him
Is this caller watching from a security camera?
That looks like a drop
Why does Neo have the phone in his hand? You’ve only done and lost it!
Neo gets captured as Trinity was watching
Time for the interogation
Neo has two lives! A software developer and a hacker!
Agent Smith brings up Morpheus and will get Neo go free is he tells them about them
He’s stolen his mouth!!
This can’t be good!
That bug has just crawled inside Neo’s belly button!
It was a dream?!?! BOO!!!
Who’s calling at this time of the night?
“You are the one, Neo”
At Adam’s Street Bridge
Neo meets with Trinity and her friends and they hold a gun at him
What the hell is that thing?
Wait… that bug was real!!!
Probably not a smart idea to throw it out on the street
Trinity takes Neo to meet with Morpheus
Your sunglasses have no arms on them
Did you really just make a Alice in Wonderland reference?
“Do you believe in fate?”
Morpheus says Neo knows something that he doesn’t know – It makes more sense in the film than in this blog
The Matrix is everywhere!!!
Decision Time – Red or Blue?
Blue Pill means the story ends
Red Pill means you “stay in Wonderland”
Neo takes the red pill!!!! – Dun Dun Dun!!
Now they made a Wizard of Oz reference
That mirror just fixed itself
Neo is turning into Silver Surfer
That scream sounded Auto-Tuned
There’s a human in his heart!!!
I hate jumping puzzles in games
OK – this is actually a giant life thing
That robot spider is killing him
IT’S THE CLAW!!!
What just happened?
Neo has no hair and is now in the real world
This acupuncture looks like it’s taken a turn for the worse
Neo’s got hair… and clothes!!!
Is Morpheus trying to tell us that we’ve traveled from 1999 to 2199?
Morpheus’s ship looks like a health hazard
That chair looks like it came out of a optitions
We’re in the loading program
This is a real clusterfuck
New York looks like shit!
“Welcome to the desert of The Real”
A.I.? Artificial Intelligence? Wasn’t that a Steven Spielberg movie?
I wish I knew what was happening
That doesn’t look good for that baby
Back in the loading room
The Matrix is a Duracell D Battery?!?
Neo breaks free and pukes light green vomit and collapses
I really have no idea what Morpheus is babbeling on about
Tank is a normal person – Does that mean everyone else is a fake?
Time for combat training
Is “Drunken Boxing” really a skill?
“I know Kung Fu” – So does the band Ash!
EVERYBODY WAS KUNG FU FIGHTING!!!
THEIR BOTH AS FAST AS LIGHTNING!!!
I’M FINDING THIS A LITTLE BIT FRIGHTNING!!!
ALTHOUGHT IT IS EXCITING!!!
Moprheus looks like he didn’t break a sweat
Round 2! FIGHT!!
That was freaky
Now we’re on a rooftop
YES!!! Keanu Reeves just says “Woah!”
That didn’t go so well
Back to reality
I know this song but I can’t name it!!!
How did Agent Smith get there?
Wait… this is a training program
According to Morpheus, we are agents 
Is Morpheus’s ship flying around in a sewer?
They just admitted that they’re in a sewer
IT’S THE GIANT ROBOT SPIDER!!!! ARHH!
So… The Matrix is a bunch of code
This dude regrets not taking the blue pill
“You’re here to save the world! What do you say to that?” – I say… WOAH!!!
That steak looks very red in the middle
Agent Smith is meeting with his dude from Morpheus’s team – I knew he was a backstabber
That dude in question is names Regan
This guy looks a little like Bruno Mars
Time to take Neo to see The Oracle
We’re in the real world
Morpheus & Neo enter a run down building to see The Oracle
Morpheus has lost his sunglasses in the space of a shot
That child just made a spoon go wobbely
“That is no spoon” – IT’S A TEASPOON!!!!
The Oracle is a maid?
She looks like my old boss
Neo doesn’t believe he is “The One”
The Oracle tells Neo that Morpheus believes that Neo is The One
I hate making decisions regarding life
COOKIE!!!!
No one likes De Ja Vu
How many bullets???
YOU CAN NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!!!
You really trust Neo with a gun?
It’s like that scene in Shawshank Redemption except that dude escaped with no harm
Agent Smith has found Morpheus
Morpheus gets beat and taken away
Sneifer then shoots Tank and his mate
They find out about Sneifer’s backstabbing
There goes another one
And another
TANK’S ALIVE!!!!
Agent Smith is at Neo’s work place with Morpheus handcuffed to a chair
Time to save Morpheus
“Never send a human to do a machine’s job”
Tank is about to pull Morpheus’s plug but is stopped by Neo
Neo remembers what The Oracle told him
Neo believes he can bring Morpheus back and is back in simulation
Trinity wants to go but Neo stops her but Trinity finds a way go with him
Back with Agent Smith
That is a lot of guns to choose from
Agent Smith wants to be free by decoding Zyon
Now things just got interesting
Why did just get memories of Conker’s Bad Fur Day while watching this scene?
How weak are those pillars?
I’m glad I don’t need an elevator anytime soon
Time for a rooftop rumble
He just got a knife between the eyes!
Now that is how you dodge a bullet
MINIGUN!!!!
Morpheus finally wakes up and is shot while jumping for the helicopter
Neo catches him as Trinity flies them away
Not gonna lie… that was cool
Agent Smith finds the crash site but not them
That hobo is in spooksville!!!
Spot wasting time Trinity
The hobo is now Agent Smith!!!
Trinity made it back but Neo is still there
Time for the showdown… Western Style!!!
OH NO!!!! Neo just broke Agent Smith’s sunglasses!!!
Neo just went from being beaten up to being Superman and back to being beaten in 2 seconds
I was wondering when the next train was coming
Neo escapes the train but not Agent Smith
YOU NO-SELLING BASTARD!!!
Neo just stole a phone!!!
Don’t you just hate dead ends?!?
Those Agents can morth quickly
Meanwhile, Morpheus and the gang are in trouble
I would hate having to use that fire escape
Agent Smith is in the room and shoots Neo!!!
Neo takes 10 more bullets and is now dead!!!
“Goodbye, Mr Anderson”
Trinity just said The Oracle told her that she would fall in love with a dead man
Trinity’s kiss brings Neo back to life
Neo just stopped all those bullets with his hand
Neo looks so casual beating Agent Smith up
Neo then jumps inside Agent Smith’s body and destroys him from the inside
Morpheus sets off the EMP and kills the aliens just as Neo makes it back 
KISS ME BITCH
System failure!!! Son of a …..
THE END – with “Wake Up” by RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE!!
MARILYN MANSON “Rock is Dead!” – I’m in heaven!!! 😀
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